Yes, You read that right; My mother moved out, and for the first time in my life, I'm living on my own!!!
I am TOTALLY freaked out!!!
I don't know what to do with myself! I always daydreamed about the blessed day when I can call myself a strong, self-sufficient woman, with a cape and everything, but here I am, sitting in my living room, eating fettuccine, Listening to my culture's music, contemplating my life.
I have to tell you, it's been a long time since I really took a good look at my life...
I've always felt that one of the reasons I wasn't very productive was because I was I spent a lot of my time helping my mama feel better. It wasn't her fault, she's had a pretty hard life, and doesn't trust anyone because of it, so she has no friends but me and my sister, and even then, she's said that she trusts no one.
But now that It's just me, I'm struggling just a little to get into the groove of things. It's always been about mama, now it's about me, and I don't know how to act!
First of all, I've been trying to get into the groove of Inktober, something that year after year has become my "New Year's Resolution" in which it NEVER gets done, even though promise to follow through with doing a drawing every single day.
Yeah, that didn't happen... again.
I am TOTALLY freaked out!!!
I don't know what to do with myself! I always daydreamed about the blessed day when I can call myself a strong, self-sufficient woman, with a cape and everything, but here I am, sitting in my living room, eating fettuccine, Listening to my culture's music, contemplating my life.
I have to tell you, it's been a long time since I really took a good look at my life...
I've always felt that one of the reasons I wasn't very productive was because I was I spent a lot of my time helping my mama feel better. It wasn't her fault, she's had a pretty hard life, and doesn't trust anyone because of it, so she has no friends but me and my sister, and even then, she's said that she trusts no one.
But now that It's just me, I'm struggling just a little to get into the groove of things. It's always been about mama, now it's about me, and I don't know how to act!
First of all, I've been trying to get into the groove of Inktober, something that year after year has become my "New Year's Resolution" in which it NEVER gets done, even though promise to follow through with doing a drawing every single day.
Yeah, that didn't happen... again.
OH, nope... nope wait....
I did do one....
and it's not even finished.
IT'S OCTOBER 12TH!
and it's not even finished.
IT'S OCTOBER 12TH!
I've realized something...
I wondered why I can get things done on my terms, but when I set a deadline for anything, even things that I made the standard for.
Well, yesterday, I was watching Queer Eye, on Netflix, and in this one episode, there was a man and his girlfriend who were about to have a baby, but the poor woman was getting no help from him! I mean for God sake, she's NINE MONTHS PREGNANT!!! She can't even bend over to pick anything up, and the place looks like an absolute sty!!
It stinks in there, there are bugs all over plates.... Ugh.
Then, Karamo is standing in the kitchen with him and makes the guy look out over the mess in his kitchen and living room, and he asks the guy, "okay, what do you see?"
The guy looks over the open space filled with crust and disgust, and says, "a mess."
"Do you know what I see?" Karamo says. The guy's like, "no," And Karamo's like, "I look at this and I see someone who's overwhelmed."
And I'm sitting here and thinking Dude! That's the tweet right there!!!
Because I realized something about why I just won't finish half the things I started, or not even touch them at all, and why my half done work was in this, like, huge stack in the corner in my room... My mom hasn't moved her things out of my spare room yet.
Also, I'm overwhelmed!
Well, yesterday, I was watching Queer Eye, on Netflix, and in this one episode, there was a man and his girlfriend who were about to have a baby, but the poor woman was getting no help from him! I mean for God sake, she's NINE MONTHS PREGNANT!!! She can't even bend over to pick anything up, and the place looks like an absolute sty!!
It stinks in there, there are bugs all over plates.... Ugh.
Then, Karamo is standing in the kitchen with him and makes the guy look out over the mess in his kitchen and living room, and he asks the guy, "okay, what do you see?"
The guy looks over the open space filled with crust and disgust, and says, "a mess."
"Do you know what I see?" Karamo says. The guy's like, "no," And Karamo's like, "I look at this and I see someone who's overwhelmed."
And I'm sitting here and thinking Dude! That's the tweet right there!!!
Because I realized something about why I just won't finish half the things I started, or not even touch them at all, and why my half done work was in this, like, huge stack in the corner in my room... My mom hasn't moved her things out of my spare room yet.
Also, I'm overwhelmed!
Why didn't I see this sooner!?
There are so many things that I want to get done, and I didn't understand why I was so fricking burnt out before I ever start!
I know that I'll get them all done, but the one thing I won't do is act like this can go on any longer.
Here's the new tactic I'm taking:
I know that I'll get them all done, but the one thing I won't do is act like this can go on any longer.
Here's the new tactic I'm taking:
It's not about finishing,
It's about starting.
Now, this is something that I've been hypocritically preaching, but smaller goals are better. There's no cure for getting overwhelmed, but at least I can control it a little.
Also, I found a list that I can get through that'll help me spread the word about my art, so that I don't feel as swamped. I'll be going down the line and blogging about each one of them, but If you want to have a look at the list, it's right here...
Are there any art freaks that want to go through the list with me? If you do, I'll share your links!
And then, I'm making it a goal to just start on some of the works that I said I would either start or finish.
Also, I found a list that I can get through that'll help me spread the word about my art, so that I don't feel as swamped. I'll be going down the line and blogging about each one of them, but If you want to have a look at the list, it's right here...
Are there any art freaks that want to go through the list with me? If you do, I'll share your links!
And then, I'm making it a goal to just start on some of the works that I said I would either start or finish.
I guess that's it.
To anyone else out there who feels a little overwhelmed with their lives, I wanna say that you're not the only one. I wanted to get my life together for some time now, but there were so many avenues that I wanted to go down, and I thought I could do all of that by myself, but I can't. Not without help.
I'm definitely going to be writing about what I'm going through a lot more often, and I hope that me exposing my embarrassing self helps someone out there.
I'll try to give my take on the new discovery as I go, in case you want to check these new things out.
Do you have any stories about how overwhelmed you are being an art, or any other type of life you live?
LET ME KNOW IN THE COMMENTS!
Until next time, take it easy, art freaks! PEACE!!
I'm definitely going to be writing about what I'm going through a lot more often, and I hope that me exposing my embarrassing self helps someone out there.
I'll try to give my take on the new discovery as I go, in case you want to check these new things out.
Do you have any stories about how overwhelmed you are being an art, or any other type of life you live?
LET ME KNOW IN THE COMMENTS!
Until next time, take it easy, art freaks! PEACE!!
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